Druid — grief and loss

The British Druid Order Forums BDO Public Forum Druid — grief and loss

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  • #12450
    Anonymous

    Druid — grief and loss

    A relationship with nature, and the celtic gods and goddesses, and the faeries can help in getting over grief and loss. I also feel that many celtic people have disenfranchised their spiritual lives by not being friends with and forming connections with the Celtic gods and goddesses and the faeries. Our religious beliefs do come into the light when dealing with grief and loss and death. The earth has healing powers that can be tapped into in order to find the relief from the pain of death and loss. Being friends with the faeries and nature spirits can really help us when we are down and depressed, for the faeries can bestow upon us the gifts of love and community and nature and music. The celtic gods and goddesses can also send us love and peace and strength. Although druidry is not a religion, it is a spiritual way to live your life, and ritual can help to strengthen your ties to the celtic otherworld. How do you deal with grief and loss? Do you get angry? Do you try to block it out? Do you even have an answer for how to deal with it?

    #12451
    david poole
    Participant

    Fortunately I have not had to deal with grief or loss in a long time, I am somewhat shielded from this and very fortunate. No, Startree, I do not have an answer to this question. I guess that each of us has to deal with this issue in our own way, whatever that might entail.

    #12452
    Anonymous

    David, I am glad to hear that you have not had to deal with loss for a long time, that is always good news. However, there are ways to deal with grief and loss and death, and all those bad things that happened in the past, and we all have them. I do have to say that it looks like trump is going to lose, and that is good news for the environment. maybe one thing we get out of loss, is that it clears the way for new growth, just like death makes life possible and clears the way for new possibilities. the dark goddess Morrigan can teach us these lessons. I feel that getting some wise advice about how to deal with loss can help us live better lives, and be happier, and survive when the dark time comes. I don’t know a lot about how to deal with loss, so I would love to hear how other druids deal with death and loss. I do know it can be really really painful to have grief and loss, and even loss of social friends can really hurt, and loss of a job hurts also, because so much of our identity is tied up with our professional lives. I also know loss can throw our core personality for a knock so hard that we just want to go and hide from the world. HANG IN THERE if things get bad, because they usually get better, and loss can be how we learn what to value in life, still that does not mean that some things don’t hurt like hell. I spent 40 years as an alcoholic in an effort to try to block out my pain from loss.

    #12453
    Dowrgi
    Participant

    Good evening Startree.

    That’s very courageous of you to be so open and frank.

    This is a difficult question. I suppose, the “druid way” would be to be “one” with the pain or sense of loss, in the sense of not trying to repress it or pretend it doesn’t exist, but rather to acknowledge it and work through things. A wise man once said to me that drowning your sorrows never works because your sorrows quickly learn how to swim and you just end up with a bad headache anyway. Getting things down on paper, writing poems, songs or prose, painting or providing a creative outlet for this form of “energy” can also be therapeutic and can turn a negative into something beautiful and positive. Some of the greatest Celtic poetry and song is heartrendingly sad and you can feel that the authors were going through something genuine and yet, at the same time, they created something timeless and beautiful, too. Of course, you should always seek professional advice or help – especially if it’s really bad or runs too deep and it’s affecting your ability to function normally and have normal relationships with the world around you.

    Personally, I think our modern society puts so much pressure on us to be positive and happy all the time, wearing fake smiles, that we’ve lost the ability to deal with genuine sadness and acknowledge it – there’s nothing to be ashamed of and it’s not wrong to feel this way, the important thing is not to let it take control of you, if you know what I mean?

    I’m sorry to read of your suffering, but I’m heartened to read that you’ve found a way to deal with things that works for you.

    Bennathow
    /|\

    #12455
    Anonymous

    hi Dowgri, I do agree that the writing of poems, and stories, and creating art can help us all to heal. fortunately for me, I was gifted with the visits from some of the real faerie people who greatly helped me, and lifted my spirit up so that I was no longer compelled to drink and smoke tobacco. it seems that contact with the faerie races happens when least expected. And all of this, including contact with the goddess Rhiannon came about from my interest in Druidry. I wish I had understood earlier in life that at times it is best to wear a mask and blend in with society because it is easier on all of us when we do not stand out too much. I think you make a good point about self acknowledging of our own pain, and not acting like it is not there. I try not to hold grudges, or ill will for anyone, and I understand that all of us have to deal with the realties of life and the loss that comes with living. I have found that, though, some therapist just listen and don’t give any advice, it seems that they think that just listing is enough, but I feel that we can all learn a lot from people who share their experiences and have been through loss that is similar to ours. And when the trees die in the forest, it does make room for new growth. I am really happy that the Biden guy is going to beat trump, because I feel that at least Biden will try to do something about global warming, and that gives me hope, because I do not want to see this beautiful planet die from the global warming. and it does anger me when people do not respect nature and not even try to live in some kind of respectful relationship with nature and the plants, trees, and animals. further, I feel that the witches and druids are some of the best healers on the planet, for they are close to nature and can keep secrets. it is probably true that lots of sickness does come from stress and trauma, so things like exercise and walks in the woods are really important in keeping us happy and healthy in a wholistic way. and it always lifts my spirit when I meet kind and caring people. best William

    #12472
    Dave TheDruid-3X3
    Participant

    This is my First Samhain 3X3 Triad on such things. It is my 2006 Samhain 3×3 Triad of Wisdom. I have given copies of it to People who were dealing with such Loses in order to help them Heal.

    It Goes:

    Respects For The Dearly Departed:

    How one Respects to the Dearly Departed:
    – With Respect
    – Admire their Achievements
    – And Rejoice at having Known Them

    Even if you did not Know them:
    – They had a Impact on Nature,
    – They were Agents of Change,
    – Their Souls are also Creations of the Wheel of Life.

    If the Dearly Departed Created Negative Emotional Energies:
    – Those Energies are Recycled for Better Purposes for the Future,
    – You can Cleanse It With Consecrated Holy Water,
    – The Spaces which Spawned those Emotional Energies can be Purified.

    ————————————————————-

    One Feels Sorrow for the Loss because:
    – You Miss their Influences in your Life
    – The Circle that they were Part of is Broken
    – You can not Benefit from their Help in Life

    By Acknowledging their Achievements:
    – You set an Example for the Future
    – You are making a Promise to Preserve their Work
    – And that you will carry on their Endeavours

    When Rejoicing in having Know them:
    – You are having Gratitude to the Goddess for having Created them
    – You are Creating Good Karma for the Departed Soul
    – You are Showing the Happiness they Gave to you

    ————————————————————–

    When Paying Respects to this Turn of the Wheel of Life:
    – One should ask for Peace from the Sacred Quarters
    – The Power of Deity is Sanctified
    – That Reverence for Mother Nature is Acknowledged

    By Setting an Example for the Future:
    – You acknowledge the Lessons of the Past
    – Using the Present Remembrance to Set the Example
    – And with Good Example, the Future Preserved

    During such Remembrance, the Soul is Refreshed by:
    – The Refreshing Vibrations of Music
    – The Quenching Affect of Drink
    – And be Nourished with Good Food

    3X3

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