DowrgiYou write with honesty and courage, and it’s clear you feel a deep calling to Nature and Mother Earth. If you truly sense that connection, then it’s worth trusting. While an exact reconstruction of ancient Druidry may be elusive, traditions such as the BDO offer grounded, open approaches rooted in British and Irish traditions, without claims of secret lineages or spurious secret heritage.
As for worrying about what others think — much of what passes for ‘normal’ in our world is far from healthy. Better to be ‘odd’ in following your heart than to conform to madness, isn’t it?
Acceptance begins within: once you are at peace with yourself, those who value you for who you truly are will gather around you.
As I see it, all genuine paths are as journeys through a great forest towards the light. The forest may often be dark, yet your inner light will provide the flame to guide you. Every journey begins somewhere, and it’s fine to move slowly, knowing you can change direction if needed, but the journey also begins within.
Furthermore, feeling like a ‘lost soul’ is not a failing — it’s often the first step of the journey, suggesting that your inner flame is already alive and leading you forward.